It's haunting...

It's haunting, those feelings still attached to my lips. My hips just won't quit. I can still see your face when I close my eyes, all those times that you made me weak with desire. Those times that you graced me with your presence, I'm still aching for your touch. It seems like so long since the last time I saw you. It's been an enternity of quietness, and I'm starting to go mad. I can't take this anymore, what happened to everything we gave? Where did it all go?

It seems as if I've been waiting for a stranger, just a shadow of the person I thought you were going to be. I can't believe that I just stood there waiting, letting everything pass over me. I never slept, I never ate, all I could do was just think about you. The last thing I could ever do is get over this, get over what we never had. Can't you see what I'm feeling? Can't you feel what I've been telling you? Are my words just hallow with no meaning behind them? Or are you just to superficial to even give me the time of the day. It's like I'm lost in the depth of my heart and I can't seem to find a way out.

I can't come to terms with the fact that it's over, everything we had is gone forever. We can't go back in time anymore. Our memories will be our time machine but it's lost. Our hearts are gone, they will live in those moments for the rest of our lives. No matter how may enter, you will never be forgotten. First loves never die, they never loose hold, they may fade in time but the touches will be ever lasting. Your breathe will always be on the back of my neck.

Those light touches will never fade from my body, there presence will always drive my senses mad and I won't be able to stop it. My blood with seep slower when you're around. Your feelings may be lost but mine are just hidden, I can't let them out to play. Those old butterflies will resurrect at the sound of your voice and I just may become a puddle of my former self. I can't seem to get over it. I can't seem to get over you. 

Hopeless Romantic

I've always been somewhat of a hopeless romantic. Okay somewhat isn't the right word, I am a hopeless romantic. You give me some good chemistry and a sappy story and I'm in. Hook, line and sinker. The Notebook, super cliche I know but it gets the point across, totally teared up at the end. A Walk to Remember, love it. Both the book and the movie are great and what can I say, I totally had a crush on Shane West. Bad boy turned good, how can you resist that? He freaking built her a telescope for crying out loud. If that doesn't scream love then I don't know what does.

I guess I've always been this. It's true I like my dark side of things. Give me some awesome deep drug filled movie, Requiem for a Dream, and I'm in love with that. So there are two sides to me, I like the dark side and I also really enjoy the finer girly things in love. There are times when I wish I could be part of those stories, just to feel that ridiculous side of love. I know that real life isn't exactly like that and no one writes you a letter a day for a year.

Maybe it's just my girly side but who doesn't want that. To feel so completely in love that you would do pretty much anything to be with the person you love. To be with the person whom holds your heart in their hands. I picture these epic love scenes where they both finally confess those feelings they have been hiding deep down. I dream of that first touch, the first kiss, the anticipation that comes in those first moments. That first kiss shared between lovers is such a sight to behold. It's something that you don't forget so easily. But what if every kiss you shared was like that? What if every time they were around you those butterflies took flight?

What if you just run into a seemingly normal guy, and are throw into a situation that causes you to be dependent on them. Feelings ignite and so starts the epic love. Look at Titanic, which is like my favorite movie ever, girl wants to kill herself, is going to jump off back of ship, boy comes out of nowhere to save her. Boy shows girl the time of her life, girl doesn't know what to do. Girl eventually realizes that she loves him and boom they are in love. Barely know each other for two days and the whole world is theirs for the taking.

What if there are moments like that in life? What if there are people we meet that are like our Jacks? We  just don't know it, they've shown us love that we can't escape or we haven't meet them just yet. What if one day we'll run into them and everything we thought we knew about love was just a lie. Maybe everyone's true loves are still there, searching. Maybe your true love has been dead, but their soul waits, waits for their resurrection to be reunited with you.

What if true love does really exist?

What if this really does exist and we just don't know it yet? Or maybe this is just the hopeless romantic in me wishing it was true. Maybe I'm holding onto something that isn't there. But I guess it brings me a comfort to dream of a romance like that, even if it's only a dream.


Christina

(not sorry for my love of titanic)